Update: "Don't Save the Last Dance"

Well I know it was some time ago and it's been less than sporadic when we update this blog, but last year (August 11, 2009 to be exact) I wrote a blog entitled "Don't Save the Last Dance." The gist of that blog was talking about all the rap songs with stupid dances to go along with them and I gave a few examples of some of the latest ones out and some older songs. Well if you never read that blog hit the link above and check it out.

If you remember and or notice, at the very end of that blog I was playing around and made up the following song clearly off the dome making a mockery of this type of music see the quote below:

"However, I will proposition any choreographers out there to hit me up. callmecrecks@gmail.com or @crecks on twitter. Let's come up with a stupid dance move and make a song out of it. You do the dance I'll write and produce the song. We can do it, it can't be that hard. Wait! I already got one! The "Hula Hoop." I can hear the hook for the song now. "Do the hula hoop, do the hula hoop, work them hips 'round like you would a hula hoop. Girl do the hula hoop, do the hula hoop, you can do it too, girl, don't think you too cute!!" The dance moves can mimic something like you would do while playing with a hula hoop. LoL. I'm clowning, but I swear I'll write this shit. It would be a ghost written song however for MC Sambo or whoever I could find to be the artist. But I would gladly take the royalty checks for writing it. Matter of fact I'm going to copyright the lyrics today for all you biters out there. LoL."

Well obviously I was 100% playing around and especially didn't take heed to the last sentence of that blog about copyrights. The reason I state this and the reason for this updated blog is because as I was just downloading music last night, (legally of course ;-) I came across a song entitled "Hool-a-Hoop" by Black Frost Feat. Mista F.A.B. Now upon reading the title of the song I thought "GTFOH" (if you don't know the acronym google it). Then I said wait it can't be let me listen to this. Then I listened and said "Hell Naw!!! They done stole my song!" LoL. Not literally because obviously in the above mentioned blog I was completely playing around and making a mockery of how easy and simple it is to come up with some of the rap songs of today, especially the dance songs. But I just found it ironic how it was almost identical to what I came up with over 9 months ago off the top of my head. Please take a listen to the song below for further evidence:



All I had was the hook but I could've filled up 3 - 16 bar verses with any old filler lyrics. But this simply just 100% irrefutable evidence that most of the music now a days takes absolutely no talent and or skill to create. Now that is not to say that I have no talent because I do. But to just think that what took me 3.5 seconds to come up with while writing a blog someone actually went into the studio, produced, wrote and performed is just ridiculous to me. And trust I'm not hating because this song may blow, make whoever the artist a little money off a "one hit wonder single" and then they fade away. No by all means I'm not, I hope they make whatever they can off the song, I hope they make a video and they get to #1 on 106 & Park. That's really not the point. I'm simply exposing the truth! Hip Hop Music is not what it used to be peoples and this is as far as the creative mind is taking it these days.

If you saw last week's episode of The Boondocks, (See the link to the left for those that missed it), they ironically touched on this very same subject. I will forever be a lover of good music especially Hip Hop Music since that's the era in which I grew up in. And until songs like this stop getting air play I will continue to turn off my radio and turn on classics, when I can sit back and reminisce on when real Emcees came with it and put forth effort to master their craft. Which is not comparable to the song and dance routine that I covered in this blog or the aforementioned one.

Lastly, just a heads up we soon plan on expanding this blog into another blog where we can really get back into one of my our real loves... music. I know we've been lacking on this one but hopefully when my Partner in Crime @drizadre gets back on we will be able to keep this updated more regularly as well as the new blog coming soon. So Stay tuned...

Oh and since no one took me up on my offer last year I'll put it out there again. If any one wants to take me up on my offer to come up with a dance routine, I'll gladly ghost write the song! As you can see I'm 1 for 1. However, this time I'll leave my next dance craze to myself or at least until we can put it down and copyright it. Lol.

--C-Recks--

@crecks

Update: "Don't Save the Last Dance"

Well I know it was some time ago and it's been less than sporadic when we update this blog, but last year (August 11, 2009 to be exact) I wrote a blog entitled "Don't Save the Last Dance." The gist of that blog was talking about all the rap songs with stupid dances to go along with them and I gave a few examples of some of the latest ones out and some older songs. Well if you never read that blog hit the link above and check it out.

If you remember and or notice, at the very end of that blog I was playing around and made up the following song clearly off the dome making a mockery of this type of music see the quote below:

"However, I will proposition any choreographers out there to hit me up. callmecrecks@gmail.com or @crecks on twitter. Let's come up with a stupid dance move and make a song out of it. You do the dance I'll write and produce the song. We can do it, it can't be that hard. Wait! I already got one! The "Hula Hoop." I can hear the hook for the song now. "Do the hula hoop, do the hula hoop, work them hips 'round like you would a hula hoop. Girl do the hula hoop, do the hula hoop, you can do it too, girl, don't think you too cute!!" The dance moves can mimic something like you would do while playing with a hula hoop. LoL. I'm clowning, but I swear I'll write this shit. It would be a ghost written song however for MC Sambo or whoever I could find to be the artist. But I would gladly take the royalty checks for writing it. Matter of fact I'm going to copyright the lyrics today for all you biters out there. LoL."

Well obviously I was 100% playing around and especially didn't take heed to the last sentence of that blog about copyrights. The reason I state this and the reason for this updated blog is because as I was just downloading music last night, (legally of course ;-) I came across a song entitled "Hool-a-Hoop" by Black Frost Feat. Mista F.A.B. Now upon reading the title of the song I thought "GTFOH" (if you don't know the acronym google it). Then I said wait it can't be let me listen to this. Then I listened and said "Hell Naw!!! They done stole my song!" LoL. Not literally because obviously in the above mentioned blog I was completely playing around and making a mockery of how easy and simple it is to come up with some of the rap songs of today, especially the dance songs. But I just found it ironic how it was almost identical to what I came up with over 9 months ago off the top of my head. Please take a listen to the song below for further evidence:



All I had was the hook but I could've filled up 3 - 16 bar verses with any old filler lyrics. But this simply just 100% irrefutable evidence that most of the music now a days takes absolutely no talent and or skill to create. Now that is not to say that I have no talent because I do. But to just think that what took me 3.5 seconds to come up with while writing a blog someone actually went into the studio, produced, wrote and performed is just ridiculous to me. And trust I'm not hating because this song may blow, make whoever the artist a little money off a "one hit wonder single" and then they fade away. No by all means I'm not, I hope they make whatever they can off the song, I hope they make a video and they get to #1 on 106 & Park. That's really not the point. I'm simply exposing the truth! Hip Hop Music is not what it used to be peoples and this is as far as the creative mind is taking it these days.

If you saw last week's episode of The Boondocks, (See the link to the left for those that missed it), they ironically touched on this very same subject. I will forever be a lover of good music especially Hip Hop Music since that's the era in which I grew up in. And until songs like this stop getting air play I will continue to turn off my radio and turn on classics, when I can sit back and reminisce on when real Emcees came with it and put forth effort to master their craft. Which is not comparable to the song and dance routine that I covered in this blog or the aforementioned one.

Lastly, just a heads up we soon plan on expanding this blog into another blog where we can really get back into one of my our real loves... music. I know we've been lacking on this one but hopefully when my Partner in Crime @drizadre gets back on we will be able to keep this updated more regularly as well as the new blog coming soon. So Stay tuned...

Oh and since no one took me up on my offer last year I'll put it out there again. If any one wants to take me up on my offer to come up with a dance routine, I'll gladly ghost write the song! As you can see I'm 1 for 1. However, this time I'll leave my next dance craze to myself or at least until we can put it down and copyright it. Lol.

--C-Recks--

@crecks

Don't Save the Last Dance

"People don't dance no mo' all they do is this..." Goodie Mob

I'm Not sure if Goodie Mob was trying to be prophetic in their statement they made in those lyrics back in 1998, but it seems they were right. I will forewarn you that if you watch the videos on this particular blog that it may take away minutes of your life that you can't get back. I unfortunately was subjected to hours I can't get back while searching for these vidoes. So just know I took one for the team on this one. lol. Also, I apologize in advance if this is a bit long winded.

So as we all know the majority of music (especially rap) these days sucks. And when I say sucks I mean sucks like a vacuum, on a hoe stroll, standing next to a black hole. Sorry for the visual, but I'm sure you got my point now. I just doubt this is what our fore-fathers in hip-hop had in mind 30 years ago when they thought about where the craft would be in the future. This is precisely why I don't like to listen to the radio. The few times I have tuned in as of late, I often hear the ads requesting the citizens to help keep the radio free. They encourage us to call or write our local congressmen about the pay for performance tax. I don't know all the issues regarding the tax, but to be honest I could care less. The radio rarely plays anything I like to hear, so if they have to pay to play that crap then that's what they get for playing it.

So keeping on the topic of (C)Rap music I must admit that I can sometimes barely tolerate most of what falls into this category. But there is a particular trend in rap music that I have zero tolerance for. I'm sure from the title of this blog and my opening quote you realize that it's those Goddamn Dance songs! You just don't know how bad they irk the hell out of me!

Some of you that perhaps like these songs or just don't see my point may be asking yourself but why? Why don't you like them? Well it's simple first off the songs to me are just that...SIMPLE. It sounds like my 5 year old son wrote these lyrics using nursery rhymes as reference. As a rapper I find them highly insulting. Second, upon hearing them and not even seeing the dance I can visualize how stupid the dances look. Lastly, it's just another dumb ass trend. It's monkey see monkey do. So and so wrote a dance song so let me do the same. It's no different than when every rapper was a rock star and made rock songs, or when everyone wanted to rap fast. It's all the same. It simply boils down to No originality!

So when I began to write this blog I figured I can't just go in on the dance songs when most of them I have yet to see. Let me give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe I spoke too soon and could perhaps adopt some of these new dance moves the next time I hit the dance floor. Well good people, here come the minutes of your life you won't get back. Sorry to say. I spent hours watching this crap and finding these videos so I hope you enjoy the Uncle Tom Foolery you're about to see.

Stanky Leg


When I first heard this crap I cringed then I pictured what the dance would be in my head. Well when I finally saw this video my suspicions were confirmed. Just down right ridiculous. Ugh! Not stopping with the success of their first dance song. The follow up single by the GS Boyz is "Booty Dew." Feel free to look that one up yourself if you want to see how it's done. The videos I found may be a little too racy for some viewers.


Swag Surfin


Now when I first heard this song I was down in ATL back in May. I liked the beat and it was semi-catchy. Well by the time it came to Chicago Radio they of course played it out. And when I heard it was a dance song it immediately went on my do not play list. I get it the motions of the dance mimic what a surfer would do. But it still looks stupid. No thanks.


Chicken Wang


I'm almost sad to say the originator of this song is from Chicago. I love my city and try to rep the fellow artists from Chi. But I would be lying if I didn't say Chicago puts out a lot of garbage music. Not to mention we try to be like everyone else, so knowing that, this song is not a huge surprise. But watch as this guy demonstrates this dance. The bird flap are you for real? I mean Harold's Chicken (As seen in the video is good chicken but not good enough to make up a damn dance too. I'm mad this grown ass man doesn't even realize how dumb he looks! Damn Shame! Then he mentioned another dance soon to come "The George Jefferson." Oh lord please no!


Bird Walk


I personally can't stand Soldier boy so it's no wonder I didn't like this one either. But after the success of the Soldier Boy you should've known he'd be coming with another dance. This looks just as stupid as the first one to me.


Soldier Boy


I don't want to say this one started it all but it was definitely one of the more popular dances. I recall first hearing of Soldier Boy some years ago from one of my younger cousins. I heard him playing the song from his phone and doing this dumb ass dance. I just laughed at him and thought to myself there's no way a song or dance like that could ever become popular. Well lo and behold 2 years later I eat my words about the popularity. But I don't change my opinion it's still a stupid dance.


Ricky Bobby

I have never seen the movie Talladega Nights before, but apparently this dance is based on the lead character in that movie Ricky Bobby (played by Will Farrell). Perhaps if I saw the movie I would understand the meaning behind the dance more. But I didn't have another 2 hours to spend watching a dumb movie to figure out a dumb dance.


Walk it out

The best thing about this song to me was the re-mix with Andre 3000. Besides that thee song was crap. The dance is just about the same if you ask me. But I guess it's not as bad as some of the more recent ones. I know DJ Unk also did the song "2-Step." But I was unable to find anything depicting that particular dance.


The Jerk


Okay when I watched this video I first thought wasn't that the "Kid n' Play" dance they just did at the beginning? Then I thought was this nigga pretending to jump an imaginary rope backwards? Wtf is this the actual dance? They look like fake break dancers in pants that are way tighter than any man should ever wear. The Jerk? Yeah that's the perfect name for what they look like doing this dance. I'm good on this one.


Halle Berry


When I first heard the song I figured well it's Hurricane Cris so typical crap he put out before. I mean I think Halle Berry is fine too (top notch), but she gets her own song? Well I had no clue until doing research for this blog that there was a damn dance to the song. The video is from the Ellen Show and has Halle Berry talking about the song/dance and doing it as well. Halle Berry and any other woman can do this dance all day. She looks good doing it. But no grown ass man should be doing this dance!


Roll Your Neck

Just as indicated on the last dance and most of these dances I'll say it again "No grown ass man should be doing this dance." With that said I bring you a new dance that has yet to hit the national market yet according to the video. It's called roll your neck. Well it's self explanatory. The guys doing it in this video may as well change the name of the dance to "out the closet." Fuckouttahere with this!


Lean with it Rock with it

Again we go back a couple years and see how the dance song craze began. We all remember the lean with it rock. Then Lil' Jon came with snap ya fingaz, which was just another variation of the same dance if you ask me.


Shoulder Lean

Here's the thug version of the dance song. I guess Dro and T.I. were a little too hood to come up with a corny dance song. So they came up with the shoulder lean. I know gangstas don't dance but it's okay to do the shoulder lean. If you say so.


Chicken noodle soup


This I song to me was horrible. I'm not from Harlem nor have ever been. But I guess it was a big thing out there. So of course someone had to come up with a song for the dance. So here we have the chicken noodle soup dance. I still don't know why it's called that. Campbells makes some good soup, but I don't know if that necessarily warrants a song and dance. But then again who am I.


Harlem Shake

I blame Puffy (or Diddy as some call him) for bringing this dance to the forefront. Honestly, this could've stayed in Harlem. However, after he had the little kids doing this dance in the "Let's Get It" video. Everyone was doing it. Again, as evidenced in the video grown men should never have been doing this dance. The comedian "smokey" described this dance best. It looks like what happens to a crack head after they hit the pipe. LoL.


Crip Walk


No disrespect to anyone's gang or anything but again I didn't know that gangstas danced. I'm not sure which crip invented the crip walk, but I guess he made it cool for them to dance. Since then it's become more mainstream and everyone from lil' Bow Wow were doing it. But I people like Xzibit, and Snoop made songs about getting your walk on.


Tootsie Roll

Let's take it back to what like 94? The 69 Boyz were some of the originators and came up with this song and dance for what they called the Tootsie Roll. They took another popular dance "The Butterfly" and created their own variation called the "Tootsie Roll." I'm still not sure why it was called this, but I'm sure the Tootsie brand saw an increase in their sales over the 2 year span this song and dance were popular.


Humpty Dance

If you ask me Shock G was a mogul in the making back in the early 90's. He already rapped as himself in the group Digital Underground. But then he thought of the bright idea to create an alter Ego named Humpty Hump. Humpty was supposed to be Shock's cousin who got his nose burned and wore the humpty nose/glasses because of that. Humpty also rapped. Many didn't know shock and hump were one in the same person. He then went on to make a song and dance called the humpty hump. He was one of the originators of the dance song. It's funny I've heard this song and seen the video hundreds of times, and he even breaks it down in a verse. However, I still don't know how the dance is done.
____________________________________________________________________

Well I'm sure I left out plenty of dances and songs. But the bottom line is that its a trend in rap music that will soon be played out and we'll be on to something new. I'm not hating on them I just don't like them. They have no substance and are all stupid looking. I'm not a big dancer anyways and even if I was these wouldn't appeal to me one bit. Also, I don't go to clubs that often, but the next time I do I won't be participating when these songs come on.

However, I will proposition any choreographers out there to hit me up. callmecrecks@gmail.com or @crecks on twitter. Let's come up with a stupid dance move and make a song out of it. You do the dance I'll write and produce the song. We can do it, it can't be that hard. Wait! I already got one! The "Hula Hoop." I can hear the hook for the song now. "Do the hula hoop, do the hula hoop, work them hips 'round like you would a hula hoop. Girl do the hula hoop, do the hula hoop, you can do it too, girl, don't think you too cute!!" The dance moves can mimic something like you would do while playing with a hula hoop. LoL. I'm clowing but I swear I'll write this shit. It would be a ghost written song however for MC Sambo or whoever I could find to be the artist. But I would gladly take the royalty checks for writing it. Matter of fact I'm going to copyright the lyrics today for all you biters out there. LoL. That's it ya'll sorry it was so long.


--C-Recks--

Don't Save the Last Dance

"People don't dance no mo' all they do is this..." Goodie Mob

I'm Not sure if Goodie Mob was trying to be prophetic in their statement they made in those lyrics back in 1998, but it seems they were right. I will forewarn you that if you watch the videos on this particular blog that it may take away minutes of your life that you can't get back. I unfortunately was subjected to hours I can't get back while searching for these vidoes. So just know I took one for the team on this one. lol. Also, I apologize in advance if this is a bit long winded.

So as we all know the majority of music (especially rap) these days sucks. And when I say sucks I mean sucks like a vacuum, on a hoe stroll, standing next to a black hole. Sorry for the visual, but I'm sure you got my point now. I just doubt this is what our fore-fathers in hip-hop had in mind 30 years ago when they thought about where the craft would be in the future. This is precisely why I don't like to listen to the radio. The few times I have tuned in as of late, I often hear the ads requesting the citizens to help keep the radio free. They encourage us to call or write our local congressmen about the pay for performance tax. I don't know all the issues regarding the tax, but to be honest I could care less. The radio rarely plays anything I like to hear, so if they have to pay to play that crap then that's what they get for playing it.

So keeping on the topic of (C)Rap music I must admit that I can sometimes barely tolerate most of what falls into this category. But there is a particular trend in rap music that I have zero tolerance for. I'm sure from the title of this blog and my opening quote you realize that it's those Goddamn Dance songs! You just don't know how bad they irk the hell out of me!

Some of you that perhaps like these songs or just don't see my point may be asking yourself but why? Why don't you like them? Well it's simple first off the songs to me are just that...SIMPLE. It sounds like my 5 year old son wrote these lyrics using nursery rhymes as reference. As a rapper I find them highly insulting. Second, upon hearing them and not even seeing the dance I can visualize how stupid the dances look. Lastly, it's just another dumb ass trend. It's monkey see monkey do. So and so wrote a dance song so let me do the same. It's no different than when every rapper was a rock star and made rock songs, or when everyone wanted to rap fast. It's all the same. It simply boils down to No originality!

So when I began to write this blog I figured I can't just go in on the dance songs when most of them I have yet to see. Let me give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe I spoke too soon and could perhaps adopt some of these new dance moves the next time I hit the dance floor. Well good people, here come the minutes of your life you won't get back. Sorry to say. I spent hours watching this crap and finding these videos so I hope you enjoy the Uncle Tom Foolery you're about to see.

Stanky Leg


When I first heard this crap I cringed then I pictured what the dance would be in my head. Well when I finally saw this video my suspicions were confirmed. Just down right ridiculous. Ugh! Not stopping with the success of their first dance song. The follow up single by the GS Boyz is "Booty Dew." Feel free to look that one up yourself if you want to see how it's done. The videos I found may be a little too racy for some viewers.


Swag Surfin


Now when I first heard this song I was down in ATL back in May. I liked the beat and it was semi-catchy. Well by the time it came to Chicago Radio they of course played it out. And when I heard it was a dance song it immediately went on my do not play list. I get it the motions of the dance mimic what a surfer would do. But it still looks stupid. No thanks.


Chicken Wang


I'm almost sad to say the originator of this song is from Chicago. I love my city and try to rep the fellow artists from Chi. But I would be lying if I didn't say Chicago puts out a lot of garbage music. Not to mention we try to be like everyone else, so knowing that, this song is not a huge surprise. But watch as this guy demonstrates this dance. The bird flap are you for real? I mean Harold's Chicken (As seen in the video is good chicken but not good enough to make up a damn dance too. I'm mad this grown ass man doesn't even realize how dumb he looks! Damn Shame! Then he mentioned another dance soon to come "The George Jefferson." Oh lord please no!


Bird Walk


I personally can't stand Soldier boy so it's no wonder I didn't like this one either. But after the success of the Soldier Boy you should've known he'd be coming with another dance. This looks just as stupid as the first one to me.


Soldier Boy


I don't want to say this one started it all but it was definitely one of the more popular dances. I recall first hearing of Soldier Boy some years ago from one of my younger cousins. I heard him playing the song from his phone and doing this dumb ass dance. I just laughed at him and thought to myself there's no way a song or dance like that could ever become popular. Well lo and behold 2 years later I eat my words about the popularity. But I don't change my opinion it's still a stupid dance.


Ricky Bobby

I have never seen the movie Talladega Nights before, but apparently this dance is based on the lead character in that movie Ricky Bobby (played by Will Farrell). Perhaps if I saw the movie I would understand the meaning behind the dance more. But I didn't have another 2 hours to spend watching a dumb movie to figure out a dumb dance.


Walk it out

The best thing about this song to me was the re-mix with Andre 3000. Besides that thee song was crap. The dance is just about the same if you ask me. But I guess it's not as bad as some of the more recent ones. I know DJ Unk also did the song "2-Step." But I was unable to find anything depicting that particular dance.


The Jerk


Okay when I watched this video I first thought wasn't that the "Kid n' Play" dance they just did at the beginning? Then I thought was this nigga pretending to jump an imaginary rope backwards? Wtf is this the actual dance? They look like fake break dancers in pants that are way tighter than any man should ever wear. The Jerk? Yeah that's the perfect name for what they look like doing this dance. I'm good on this one.


Halle Berry


When I first heard the song I figured well it's Hurricane Cris so typical crap he put out before. I mean I think Halle Berry is fine too (top notch), but she gets her own song? Well I had no clue until doing research for this blog that there was a damn dance to the song. The video is from the Ellen Show and has Halle Berry talking about the song/dance and doing it as well. Halle Berry and any other woman can do this dance all day. She looks good doing it. But no grown ass man should be doing this dance!


Roll Your Neck

Just as indicated on the last dance and most of these dances I'll say it again "No grown ass man should be doing this dance." With that said I bring you a new dance that has yet to hit the national market yet according to the video. It's called roll your neck. Well it's self explanatory. The guys doing it in this video may as well change the name of the dance to "out the closet." Fuckouttahere with this!


Lean with it Rock with it

Again we go back a couple years and see how the dance song craze began. We all remember the lean with it rock. Then Lil' Jon came with snap ya fingaz, which was just another variation of the same dance if you ask me.


Shoulder Lean

Here's the thug version of the dance song. I guess Dro and T.I. were a little too hood to come up with a corny dance song. So they came up with the shoulder lean. I know gangstas don't dance but it's okay to do the shoulder lean. If you say so.


Chicken noodle soup


This I song to me was horrible. I'm not from Harlem nor have ever been. But I guess it was a big thing out there. So of course someone had to come up with a song for the dance. So here we have the chicken noodle soup dance. I still don't know why it's called that. Campbells makes some good soup, but I don't know if that necessarily warrants a song and dance. But then again who am I.


Harlem Shake

I blame Puffy (or Diddy as some call him) for bringing this dance to the forefront. Honestly, this could've stayed in Harlem. However, after he had the little kids doing this dance in the "Let's Get It" video. Everyone was doing it. Again, as evidenced in the video grown men should never have been doing this dance. The comedian "smokey" described this dance best. It looks like what happens to a crack head after they hit the pipe. LoL.


Crip Walk


No disrespect to anyone's gang or anything but again I didn't know that gangstas danced. I'm not sure which crip invented the crip walk, but I guess he made it cool for them to dance. Since then it's become more mainstream and everyone from lil' Bow Wow were doing it. But I people like Xzibit, and Snoop made songs about getting your walk on.


Tootsie Roll

Let's take it back to what like 94? The 69 Boyz were some of the originators and came up with this song and dance for what they called the Tootsie Roll. They took another popular dance "The Butterfly" and created their own variation called the "Tootsie Roll." I'm still not sure why it was called this, but I'm sure the Tootsie brand saw an increase in their sales over the 2 year span this song and dance were popular.


Humpty Dance

If you ask me Shock G was a mogul in the making back in the early 90's. He already rapped as himself in the group Digital Underground. But then he thought of the bright idea to create an alter Ego named Humpty Hump. Humpty was supposed to be Shock's cousin who got his nose burned and wore the humpty nose/glasses because of that. Humpty also rapped. Many didn't know shock and hump were one in the same person. He then went on to make a song and dance called the humpty hump. He was one of the originators of the dance song. It's funny I've heard this song and seen the video hundreds of times, and he even breaks it down in a verse. However, I still don't know how the dance is done.
____________________________________________________________________

Well I'm sure I left out plenty of dances and songs. But the bottom line is that its a trend in rap music that will soon be played out and we'll be on to something new. I'm not hating on them I just don't like them. They have no substance and are all stupid looking. I'm not a big dancer anyways and even if I was these wouldn't appeal to me one bit. Also, I don't go to clubs that often, but the next time I do I won't be participating when these songs come on.

However, I will proposition any choreographers out there to hit me up. callmecrecks@gmail.com or @crecks on twitter. Let's come up with a stupid dance move and make a song out of it. You do the dance I'll write and produce the song. We can do it, it can't be that hard. Wait! I already got one! The "Hula Hoop." I can hear the hook for the song now. "Do the hula hoop, do the hula hoop, work them hips 'round like you would a hula hoop. Girl do the hula hoop, do the hula hoop, you can do it too, girl, don't think you too cute!!" The dance moves can mimic something like you would do while playing with a hula hoop. LoL. I'm clowing but I swear I'll write this shit. It would be a ghost written song however for MC Sambo or whoever I could find to be the artist. But I would gladly take the royalty checks for writing it. Matter of fact I'm going to copyright the lyrics today for all you biters out there. LoL. That's it ya'll sorry it was so long.


--C-Recks--

Closed Captions

So I've been reading a local paper here in Chicago called The Red Eye a lot lately and they have this segment in there called Captions. Basically they put a picture up and you can text in a caption for the picture. If it's what they consider the best one then they feature it in the next day's issue along with your name. Well by chance a couple of weeks ago one of my captions actually was chosen. The image is below.

You may have to click on it to read clearly. But basically it's a pic of Ryan Seacrest with his hands in his pocket on what looks like a red carpet. My caption read: "I would take my hands out of my pockets but I didn't get my manicure this morning." Then my name is to the right of it.

So I thought it would be fun to do something similar on this blog. I'll see what types of random and hopefully funny pics I can find online. Then I will see what kind of caption I can come up with for each. Don't worry I'll try to keep it clean for the most part or maybe not. LoL. Also, I usually come off the top of the head so I can't guarantee the captions will be 100% funny. But I've been told that I tend to crack myself up and laugh at my own jokes often. So if nothing else this will be entertaining to me. LOL.

Alright Here we go!

"I know I'm a bit new to this going down town thing. I mean I've heard of eating pussy but no one ever told me it would eat you back!"

Shaq: "Sorry Lebron I put on a little weight over the off season. But we can still make a run for the title this season. Look I can finally knock down my Free throws!!"

No one really knew that Notorious B.I.G. believed in Hinduism. Well he was reincarnated into this deer, but he's still spitting his same lyrics "Big is lookin to hurt what's under that skirt!!"

"Before I started taking Viagara I was only able to make women rise using magic. But now when the time is right I can rise to the occasion as well." ;-)


Girl: **Reading Cue Card in obvious reading voice** You may not believe it, but it is true, if it was not for his shirt I wouldn't have been attracted to him."

"Dammit grandma stop being a light weight. This is the last time I take shots of Patron with you."

"Hey dude remember that stripper from the bachelor party last night wearing the mask? Look at your bride's tongue ring. Doesn't it terribly look familiar?"

Guy Pointing:"Damn homie you see the ass on shorty right there she thick as hell!?!" Last guy on right: Nigga put on your glasses that's Olive Oil!!

Guy: "I know you can't wait to get me home can you?" Girl: **Laughs** "Have you ever hear that how a man dances is similar to how he performs in bed?" **Shrugs** "Good thing I have a vibrator."

"Damn weed has me with the munchies and I only had enough money for 5 bags of snacks. But if I throw this book hard enough at the vending machine glass it may break and I can get more."

"Thanks girls for adding more songs to my I-Tunes for me. This new shit by Jigga is off the Heazy for Sheezy! Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey Goodbye!"

"I should've known not to trust her hating ass. How the hell did I let her convince me to do the Stanky Leg down a runway anyways?"




"Not only do I use this to take the whole family's blood pressure. But truth be told this thing doubles as a penis pump for your dad."

"She's not quite Jessica Simpson in Dukes of Hazard. But hell, she's close enough. Besides at my age I don't get too many of these opportunities."

Man: **Does Bird call** "What Happen to that Boy?" Woman: "Honey let's go! I told you that no matter how many times you do that stupid bird call you will not be ballin like Baby from Cash Money Millionaires."

"Ladies and gentlemen I am broadcasting live from atop a 7-Story building where I will attempt to be the first reporter to end his fear of heights on Live television."

Okay that's all I could find online. Hope you got at least 1 or 2 laughs out of those. Hell I got more than a few while writing. LoL. I'll try to find more random pics for another of these posts at a later date.

--C-Recks--

Closed Captions

So I've been reading a local paper here in Chicago called The Red Eye a lot lately and they have this segment in there called Captions. Basically they put a picture up and you can text in a caption for the picture. If it's what they consider the best one then they feature it in the next day's issue along with your name. Well by chance a couple of weeks ago one of my captions actually was chosen. The image is below.

You may have to click on it to read clearly. But basically it's a pic of Ryan Seacrest with his hands in his pocket on what looks like a red carpet. My caption read: "I would take my hands out of my pockets but I didn't get my manicure this morning." Then my name is to the right of it.

So I thought it would be fun to do something similar on this blog. I'll see what types of random and hopefully funny pics I can find online. Then I will see what kind of caption I can come up with for each. Don't worry I'll try to keep it clean for the most part or maybe not. LoL. Also, I usually come off the top of the head so I can't guarantee the captions will be 100% funny. But I've been told that I tend to crack myself up and laugh at my own jokes often. So if nothing else this will be entertaining to me. LOL.

Alright Here we go!

"I know I'm a bit new to this going down town thing. I mean I've heard of eating pussy but no one ever told me it would eat you back!"

Shaq: "Sorry Lebron I put on a little weight over the off season. But we can still make a run for the title this season. Look I can finally knock down my Free throws!!"

No one really knew that Notorious B.I.G. believed in Hinduism. Well he was reincarnated into this deer, but he's still spitting his same lyrics "Big is lookin to hurt what's under that skirt!!"

"Before I started taking Viagara I was only able to make women rise using magic. But now when the time is right I can rise to the occasion as well." ;-)


Girl: **Reading Cue Card in obvious reading voice** You may not believe it, but it is true, if it was not for his shirt I wouldn't have been attracted to him."

"Dammit grandma stop being a light weight. This is the last time I take shots of Patron with you."

"Hey dude remember that stripper from the bachelor party last night wearing the mask? Look at your bride's tongue ring. Doesn't it terribly look familiar?"

Guy Pointing:"Damn homie you see the ass on shorty right there she thick as hell!?!" Last guy on right: Nigga put on your glasses that's Olive Oil!!

Guy: "I know you can't wait to get me home can you?" Girl: **Laughs** "Have you ever hear that how a man dances is similar to how he performs in bed?" **Shrugs** "Good thing I have a vibrator."

"Damn weed has me with the munchies and I only had enough money for 5 bags of snacks. But if I throw this book hard enough at the vending machine glass it may break and I can get more."

"Thanks girls for adding more songs to my I-Tunes for me. This new shit by Jigga is off the Heazy for Sheezy! Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey Goodbye!"

"I should've known not to trust her hating ass. How the hell did I let her convince me to do the Stanky Leg down a runway anyways?"




"Not only do I use this to take the whole family's blood pressure. But truth be told this thing doubles as a penis pump for your dad."

"She's not quite Jessica Simpson in Dukes of Hazard. But hell, she's close enough. Besides at my age I don't get too many of these opportunities."

Man: **Does Bird call** "What Happen to that Boy?" Woman: "Honey let's go! I told you that no matter how many times you do that stupid bird call you will not be ballin like Baby from Cash Money Millionaires."

"Ladies and gentlemen I am broadcasting live from atop a 7-Story building where I will attempt to be the first reporter to end his fear of heights on Live television."

Okay that's all I could find online. Hope you got at least 1 or 2 laughs out of those. Hell I got more than a few while writing. LoL. I'll try to find more random pics for another of these posts at a later date.

--C-Recks--